Since May 25, 2020 I have been set on a journey of what I thought was learning about racism in America, what it is, how it affects people of color, how I have contributed to it, and how I can become a vessel of healing and reconciliation. But what this journey has also revealed was the unseen parts of myself in the process, how those hidden parts affected me and how to allow healing to flow in them that all of me is reconciled to God. Only in this can I, myself be real, authentic, and effective for only through personal healing, can I become the whole person God dreamed of in His heart before I was born.
Woundedness affects us all, individually, and collectively. It does not take much effort to gravitate towards others who bear the same wounds as we do. Speech and actions really are a megaphone most of the time for the wounds we carry for those wounds have been so great, whether acute or continual and chronic, they mold us into the people we have become which most often opposes being transformed into the image of Christ. I seem to be different, my own wounds do not shout “I am wounded”, mine hide so deeply, shut off to the world no one would know they were there, not even me for I learned at an early age to disassociate myself from them for my own survival. When wounds are never given a voice, they stay buried causing pain and damage, and some will take them all the way to the grave.
This one thing connects me to the racial wounds I see today. Just as mine have never found their voice, so have the deep generational wounds of racism not found theirs. When this happens, we find ways to “deal with”, “live with” “grow accustomed to their presence” and basically develop a “thick skin” to keep them under wraps. But wounds that are not tended to eventually become infected and infection spreads, it smells, and it kills. Because of the goodness of God, He will make us aware of the existence of these infected places and now that we know, we are responsible to bring them to Him for exposure to the light of His great love and mercy for healing and wholeness. Wholeness is what He wants for us, mind, body, emotions, and spirit for when one part is broken all are affected.
Imagine a world of healed and whole people. People who have been restored to their true self, their authentic God-breathed, God-formed self that demonstrates who He is in our area of influence. A people that honors God by honoring the value of God in each other. Truly a people of every tribe, every nation and every tongue surrounding the Throne but doing so here on earth.
We all have the age-old question inside of us “Who am I”? Who am I created to be? What am I created to do? What is my purpose on this earth? The answer begins with knowing who we are and that is found in Matthew 16, the conversation Peter had with Jesus “who do you say that I am”? We must first know who He is before we can know ourselves for, we were created in His heart. Once we do, we are open to the revelation of heaven to hear the Lord say, “You are”! This place of sacred identity is the place we build wholeness for in this place alone can we really say, “I AM”! “I am my Beloved’s, and He is mine”! (Song of Solomon 5:3) This is the place no weapon formed against us can prosper, (Isaiah 54:16) this is the place that hell cannot prevail against. (Matthew 16:18) When we come to intimate knowledge of Him and of ourselves, we become hidden in Him, abiding in Him and the enemy has to go through Him to get to us. (Ephesians 2:6)